Forgive me for not freaking out about exams. I finished my papers for the semester, and exams seem like a molehill. I finished a paper on Friday that was 15 pages. At least it made the 5 page paper I turned in today look like a drop in the bucket. I think the thing most sorely lacking during exam time is (drumroll) perspective. So here’s a small dose:
What’s one test? In light of your entire life, pretty small. In light of eternity, pretty much nothing.
God loves you, whether or not you make an A (and guess what, whether or not you pass, too!)
Failing or doing poorly on one test is not going to divert the plans of the almighty God.
You probably know most of it anyway. Stop fretting, study what you can, do your best, and have a little perspective.
I would also like to take this moment to thank the chain smokers outside my window for the cancer and the asthma.
I can’t believe the semester really is over. It feels odd to be here and not have class. Furthermore (there’s the paper talk), I’ve been so stressed for the past month that I am practically buoyant with this freedom and burdenlessness! Strap me to the chair, I’m going to fly away!
Speaking of flying away…
I can’t help but wonder if God is preparing me to never be “home,” to never be comfortable. It’s understandable in a couple different ways. This isn’t home, this broken earth isn’t our eternal resting place. That I can accept. The worse part, though, is the fear that I’m never (or hardly ever) going to get to rightly call a place on this earth “home.” I am such a homebody! I love to be around the familiar, the traditional, the well-worn and memory-filled. I am going to be with my family this Christmas, but I can’t call their apartment home. Home seems like a thing of the past, something of childhood. You may say, oh but Corinne! You’ll grow older and settle down and have a new home! Maybe I will (but I sincerely hope settling down is quite a ways off). I’ve always been petrified of living and dying in the same place – funny for a homebody, right? The things I want to do with my life involve not staying in one place for very long. And furthermore, doesn’t God call us out of our comfort zones? And doesn’t he use us through our weaknesses?
Just some thoughts I’ve been mulling over. I think I found my dream job, getting paid to live overseas and write about it. Now I just have to get my dream job. Ha. We’ll see.